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THE BOARD OF INQUIRY @ SKYBASE

 

Some possible consequences arising from incidents in ‘New Captain Scarlet’

By Keryn

 

 

·        Captain Scarlet discovers the main reason for Destiny’s frequently miserable expression - she’s put on a few pounds and her uniform is now fit to burst.

 

·        Colonel White is alarmed at the number of personnel who have exited Skybase by jumping off, as he suspects they are treating it as some kind of game.  The Colonel authorises the formation of Spectrum’s first Bungy Jumping Team as a stopgap solution.

 

·        The Mysterons begin to question whether Captain Black has the required level of commitment to their cause, as he seems to be actually enjoying his work far too much.  They issue him with the following edict: “The complete destruction of Earth is a serious business - it is not supposed to be fun.

 

·        Captain Blue’s determination not to take a secondary position in any working partnership is seriously hampered by his tendency to talk in clichés - a surefire indicator of sidekick status.

 

·        Colonel White finds he has been flooded with Occupational Health and Safety workplace claims…after he had Skybase personnel flooded with gas in the ‘Virus’ incident.

 

·        To stop excessive bouncing when walking, Spectrum personnel have had lead plates fitted to the soles of their boots.

 

·        Following the ‘Enigma’ incident, Lieutenant Green signs on for a refresher course on world political boundaries.  Lieutenant Green now knows there is only one Northern Territory in Australia.

 

·        One of the Angels causes a fashion sensation when she wears an outfit that doesn’t cling to the body as though it’s been painted on.  She reveals this highly innovative fabric is known as…cotton.

 

·        Captain Magenta is called before a Spectrum Board of Enquiry for his persistent (and unsuccessful) attempts to chat up Spectrum’s female personnel on Skybase.  The Board is undecided whether to issue him with a Formal Warning and Restriction of Privileges or, in a departure from established military procedures, let the aggrieved women determine a suitable punishment. Having discovered exactly what punishments have been suggested, Captain Magenta pleads for the Formal Warning ‘and whatever else the Board may deem as appropriate’.

 

·        Following the destruction of Ragnarok, the Mysterons hint they might be looking for a suitable alternate piece of real estate ‘if the location and name is right’.  The citizens of Tombstone are said to be nervous.

 

·        The Spectrum Noise Abatement Committee organises a successful petition to reduce the maximum decibel level permissible for musical instruments on Skybase - and that’s the last anyone sees of Captain Grey and his bagpipes.

 

·        Next week the Board of Enquiry will re-convene to consider complaints from Spectrum personnel concerning Dr Gold's frequent practice of injecting drugs into his patients without any warning.

 

 

T H E   E N D

 

AT THE BOARD OF ENQUIRY...

THE BOARD OF ENQUIRY RECONVENES

OTHER STORIES BY KERYN

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