A Captain Scarlet Christmas Story
By Intensity Angel
“I
know you’re gone,
You
said you’re gone,
But
I can still feel you here.”
(Spice
Girls: Goodbye)
It’s been two long months since
I last visited you, Chan. Two very long months. You’ve been on my mind an awful
lot, as per usual. You are the only person I ever think about nowadays. I can’t
shake you off, even if I did try. I love you too much to not care, even though,
yes, I died long ago. We were so young back then when I was alive, when
we were together. But remember what they say, that those who you love never
die, not unless you forget them. I doubt you’d ever forget me. The first man to
make your heart skip a beat.
Now
where are you on this vessel that sails on the clouds of golden dreams? I’ve
looked everywhere for you. Your quarters, the Amber Room, the Sickbay,
everywhere else I think you would go. I’ve only seen the now familiar faces of
the Cloudbase complement.
That
brings back memories. Lovely memories. You were always good at hide and seek.
After ten minutes, I’d give in and you’d sneak up on me and seek me instead.
You would give me that look I loved so much. That one that said you were the
boss of my life.
The
times I’ve come and visited you, I’ve never seen that old sparkle emerge. It
died along with me. I wish it hadn’t, but it did. And there is nothing in this
world of wonders that can ever bring it back. Nothing in this world of
incredible wonders that can bring me back. I was cremated and my ashes
scattered over the ocean I loved to fly over…
Damm
this spirit life I lead! I want to hold you, to kiss you, to embrace you in my
arms and let you know that I’m still alive! I want you to be happy but everything
I touch turns to air and my desperate hands pass through emptiness like a
dolphin through water. Hell hath neither beauty nor reason to desire!
I
left you last time in a sleep so deep, you may have slept a thousand years,
never to be awakened by the man you wish it to be. Me. Richard Samuels, former
aircraft racer, five years older.
It will have to be some other
man now. Ouch, that hurts! I clutch my chest as if a red arrow has struck my
dead heart.
No.
No. What am I doing? Feeling angry? Knowing that you will no longer love me
because you love someone else? That’s what I want! I want you to be happy, yet
I can’t find you to let you know I want you and that Doctor Fawn guy to love
one another. To be happy, to get married, settle in the future, have a couple
of kids, a dog, something!
I
break down into silent sobs. Tears that will never fall and trickle down my
face as I look again and again, trying to find you.
Alas,
I find you, walking towards your quarters in full flight uniform, your helmet under
your arm. Of course, how could I forget? You must’ve been on duty in Angel One.
Trust me not to look there of all places. Tut, tut, eh Chan? Well done Richard, you’ve done
it again. Forgot something, again.
“You always seem to forget
something, Richard. Lucky I remember what you fail to keep in mind.”
One of many fine picnics when
we visited my hometown in England. The weather was always perfect, the sun
always out and the ducks would forever be scavenging for bread.
You enter your quarters and turn
the lights on low, and order for music, something calm and genial. I don’t
recognise the tune you are playing.
“Three o’clock in the morning,
And it looks like it’s going to be
another sleepless night”
It sure does look like it’s
going to be another sleepless night. I spy you remove a pretty little number
from your wardrobe. You examine it, as if looking for an answer, then hang it
up on a hook in your bathroom. You stand still and seem to realise I’m here,
but then it’s gone and you move to your computer, quickly scan your messages,
then switch off the monitor and hum along to the song.
My stomach churns in ways I
never thought it could. I walk over to you, reach to stroke your face, and then
back off. No. I may be used to being a ghost but I don’t want to put my hand
through you by accident. Worst-case scenario.
You look at the old battered
clock by your bedside table, and decided to get ready. I wouldn’t dare watch a
woman get undressed, not even you, Chan. I’m too much of a gentleman, despite
being a former racing pilot, and cargo carrier pilot, the best in my field in
fact. You disappear into the bathroom, to get changed into that fine little
black dress.
Didn’t I once buy you a little
black dress, prior to our engagement? Well prior if I remember correctly. You
were really chuffed with it. Wore it the night you got it. We went to fine a
restaurant. Your dad was insistent on paying for the meal. We got on so well,
despite the fact that I was a bit of a rogue one.
As I look around your tidy
quarters, I spy remnants of your past. An old clock, our teddy bear, a samurai
sword elegantly displayed, a painting, and various other items. Hang on. What
is this doing here?
On your dressing table, I see
a badge. No ordinary badge. It is an old one. It’s an old RAF badge. Why? I
gave it to you, when we first met. It was love at first sight, back in 2059.
You were seventeen at the time. You were still in school, a young student. I
was twenty-two, a young man with the world at his feet and an old Triumph motorbike
as an everyday ride. That was when I raced planes. ‘The Red Swift’ was my
aircraft. I was winning loads of races in her.
Curious how on that day, the
old girl had engine problems, and I was up trying to fix it. You and a couple
of friends were visiting the airfield I was on. Just to have a look around,
have a nosey. You separated from the others, and spotted a young man working on
a bright red plane. You walked over, and asked what I was doing. That’s when my
stomach did a somersault.
In my youth I had so many
failed relationships. I didn’t exactly get on with my dad either. I didn’t go
into the military like he wanted me to. I was the youngest of three sons, and
the wildest. I didn’t really care much about my education, I just wanted to fly
and race planes, did well in mechanics and that stuff and it was easy enough to
become an apprentice for the old man who fixed up 20th Century
aircraft for museums.
But here I was, looking down
at the most superb looking girl I’d ever seen. Adorable brown eyes stood out
from a pretty face, and your hair, so lovely. I drank in your beauty. I was so
entranced I failed to see your eyes alight with joy and love. Looked like
Christmas had come early that year.
We got talking, and one thing
led to another, and then you had to go. That’s when I gave you the badge, and
my phone number. You said your dad would kill you if he ever found out. I told
you that my dad would gladly line me up in front of a firing squad. You thought
I was joking; I was being bloody serious.
My mind drifts back into this
year. How long ago was that first meeting? It’s 2068 now. Time never crawls but
it flies. And we certainly flew together when my old girl was flying again. She
was a two seater after all. You loved it, but followed you father’s request and
went to university. However, I followed you. I realised that my racing days
were over. I was hopelessly captured by you, and found myself willing to start
a new life. I moved to Tokyo and settled down. I joined a cargo plane force but
soon realised my mistake.
We lost touch. You were in
university or something. I spent the next three months just flying cargo craft,
gaining respect and, yes, I occasionally flew my old girl, but it wasn’t how
I’d planned it.
Suddenly, you were back in my
life again. 2062. Wow! You looked prettier than ever. That was it after that.
We were together, and I refused to let you go. Even greater news, your father
accepted me into the family. I was like his son. He didn’t mind my background;
he loved me because I made you happy. I’m sorry he died when he did.
He died in 2065. I died the
year before. You were heart stricken. The two men you loved the most, both gone
within twelve months of each other.
No! I can hear your sobbing in
the back of my head. It’s like poison. Oh why did I head out into that
thunderstorm? Why? Why? Why? We both
knew the risks of thunderstorms over the Pacific, but I so wanted to do that
flight and prove myself to, well, anyone who would care. I remember your
pleading. You begged me not to, and you were right, little darling Angel, you
were so right.
I never made it out of that
thunderstorm alive. I never made it to our wedding day the following year. It
was our wedding day that my oldest brother died on. YOU STUPID IDIOT, RICHARD
SAMUELS! YOU STUPID IDIOT, FOR FLYING WHEN YOU DID! YOU RUINED HER LIFE!
I wish I could tell you, Chan,
just how much I am hurting inside. I may be a ghost but I’m human too. And I
regret hurting you! Destroying you and turning you into someone you’re not.
Argh! No! I love you so much, Chan. I just want to hold you, and kiss you, and
assure you I’m here. We’re here for you, Chan, your father and me. We both love
you. And you know that. You know we will always love you, even though we are
deceased and no longer walking. Your father is with your mother. He’ll drop by
later. But I’m here now, Chan. I’m your Christmas spirit, and I’m here to
spread some Christmas magic.
I love you Chan, I always
will, and I understand you’ve moved on so much. You’re a hero Chan, and an
Angel, a lovely beautiful Angel at that.
In love with a doctor? Why,
Chan, your taste in men is puzzling. First a bad boy, now a man with a brain
cram-packed with info on viruses, surgical techniques and Retrometabolism. I
feel sorry for Captain Scarlet, must be pretty annoying to be a scientist’s
ideal play toy.
You remerge, dressed for a
night with your special fellow. You start to apply your makeup, before you stop
and pause, and walk towards your bed. That picture of me is out again, by the
side of your bed. It was taken on Christmas the one year. I’m dressed in my
uniform, and I’m wearing a Christmas hat. I wrote on that picture:
My
heart belongs to you, Chan.
Love Richard, XXX
You’ve kept it all this time, only
getting it out on my birthday, Halloween, Christmas, your birthday, New Year’s
Day when I proposed, and our wedding date, the wedding day that never happened.
You look at the picture of me,
and smiled lovingly.
“I love you, Richard.”
I love you too, Chan. I place
a gentle kiss upon the back of your neck. You smile and turn your head
slightly, like you detected me.
“You will always be in my heart, love at
first sight isn’t easy to shake off, I just wish we could be together again one
day.”
In heaven, high above Cloudbase, one day
in the future, my harmonious angel. One day in the distant future.
“I will always love you,
Richard.”
I know, but love Doctor Fawn
like you loved me and enjoy your sweet young life, Chan.
It is time to leave. All is
said and all is done, and joy to all ye merry men. I followed the star to the
little place, resting on the clouds of golden dreams, where a young lady, clad
in a gold and white, stands face first, into the battle, into the war of
Earth’s dear life. And for the first time in so many years, I look in her eyes,
and I see that her old sparkle had returned once more…
The Writer Writes Once More
I would like to thank my good friend
Rachael for helping plant this idea in my head. I have enjoyed writing this
story an awful lot despite suffering a bad case of Writer’s Block (I think
that’s an understatement). Following the completion of my Halloween stories, I
turned my attention to plots for Christmas stories only to find I couldn’t
think of anything. I ended up trawling my previous fan fiction for inspiration,
along with Rachael. Richard Samuels is indeed the ghost from ‘On This Night Of Nights’ who is
Harmony Angel’s former fiancé. I decided to use him again, not only to give him
more depth, but because I once had an encounter with a familiar presence. There
are many people who have felt that their deceased loved ones are beside them
and are talking to them. Seeing as
Harmony was asleep in ‘On This Night
Of Nights’, she couldn’t realise he was there.
The song quotes I’ve used are from
‘Talking In Your Sleep’ by Martine McCutcheon and ‘Goodbye’ by the Spice Girls.
This story has been creating purely for
the love of writing and I have no intention of gaining profit from it.
I wish everyone a very merry
Christmas, and a happy new year. Oh, and if your gran does knit you a woolly
jumper this year, just be polite and keep your cursing thoughts to yourself!
Merry Christmas
Intensity Angel
17th November 2008
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